Emotional Wasteland

Been doing a lot of thinking lately about who I am, where I want to go in life and how I'm supposed to get there. I seem to be however, stuck in this whirlpool of...[self doubt]? I'm not sure exactly. I fear that if I don't find a ray of light soon, the path I'm on could have the potential to turn into a harmful one. How do you break the patterns of self defeating behavior? I know true strength blossoms from the inside and blooms outward. I only need to find my seed of strength.

Broken.

<p>I've got 10,000 pieces that is me. While I'm sitting here patiently trying to put them back together, they are all fighting and screaming to go in different directions. </p>

365 Days of Freedom

Today marks exactly one year since I left my worthless ex-husband. I am certainly celebrating! Happy One-Year Freedom Anniversary to Me!

My accomplishments for the last 365 days: got into my own apartment, paid off my car, obtained two wonderful jobs, started college, got everything I wanted in my divorce and most importantly, I get to see Zoey every day.

Zaks accomplishments: he's got a girlfriend, lives with his brother, and lost his truck for a duii.

Not that anybody is keeping track, but I'm pretty sure I'm kicking ass.

How does one become a butterfly? she asked pensively. You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.
Trina Paulus

I Will Never Forget You.

Though our time was sporadically spent together over a few months, I believe you left a lasting impression in my life. I learned a great deal about my strengths and weaknesses and how easy it can be to love and wholly accept another person for who they are. After my separation I felt I'd never be able to open my heart and care for another human being again. You (in your own peculiar way) helped me unlock the door. Life is short; not to be wasted on anything, let alone being afraid. I have been reminded to continually practice gratitude. Not everything in life is meant to last forever. I will cherish everything and everyone that enters into my life.

Thank you for everything. Really. I wish you only the absolute best with your family, your schooling, your health, your heart, and everything else that life may have to offer. I hope you always keep that wonderful smile on your face; it suits you well.

With love,

McKenzie

...

I think every single mom/parent wants their child to think they're amazing. I certainly am no exception. My daughter is my whole world. I know I would do anything for her, and I would do it in a heartbeat. I love my baby girl more than anything.

Opposite.

The opposite of being loved, in regards to either a friend or a partner, is being ignored. You don't ignore those you care about-unless they never really mattered in the first place.

I'm In A "Fuck It" Kind Of Mood Today.

So I'm gonna dye my hair. Do something a little more drastic!